Tag / food

by whyididntwritetoday

‘The Way’

On my lunch break today I wandered over to a nearby market for some street grub.

Predictably enough, as it was a Friday lunchtime, it was packed.

Just as I was working out which stall to go to, I saw a whirl of motion somewhere in the crowd and watched as a guy drove his way through, burrito clasped firmly in his hand.

“Get out of the way, out of the way, out of the way” was all he kept saying to himself.

He annoyed everyone.

As he eventually disappeared I thought about that term. ‘The way’.

How often do we say it? That person got in the way, there was a car in the way, etc.

But, what we never think is that, quite often, our way isn’t the same as everyone else’s.

When writing to selling a product, for example, there’s a certain way we want the customer to go…a way that benefits us eventually.

But, to be successful, we need to make it the right way for the customer.

And, to do that, we need to keep in mind that ‘the way’ for us isn’t always ‘the way’ for everyone else.

Ashley Brown 2017

by whyididntwritetoday

How kebabs can teach you not to bullshit

I didn’t write yesterday because I spent a good part of the day chasing up leads for a new car.

Buying a car takes a lot of thought. Aesthetics, reliability and character need to be in abundance for me to even think about exchanging monies.

My adventures took me to a small coastal town, and as is common when you’re near the seaside, I indulged in a traditional dish of chips. Simple, honest food with a dash of ketchup, a spatter of vinegar and a generous dollop of Ketchup.

Sadly it was ketchup from one of those sachets which require you to have a degree in engineering to even open them.

It was while I sat there that I saw something of beauty. It was an advert for kebabs. Now, I don’t really eat them myself so initially I disregarded it.

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But, then my attention was drawn back. I realised that it was a near perfect advertisement.

The language was clipped and easy to follow. The picture caught the eye. The benefits were clear.

I could even overlook the lack of punctuation as it was just so easy to read. Sometimes it doesn’t take a writing degree to write some good copy in order to flog something.

It knows the target audience – speaks directly to them, and sells the product. No bullshit, no being too clever and no glossy language.

The art of cutting out the bullshit and getting to the point is in danger. I’m all for pretty prose and slick sentences, but sometimes you don’t need either.

by whyididntwritetoday

A dinner party for strangers…

You’ve been asked to help your friend host a dinner party. You’re a decent cook and you know your way around a wine-food pairing scale, so you should have no problems.

The catch is…you don’t know any of the guests – they’re all your friend’s friends. Of course that’ll create a few general social hurdles for you to scale when the night comes, such as initiating conversation with strangers (!!) – but, the main obstacle is having to cook and prepare a night of entertainment for some people you know nothing about.

So what do you do? I mean, yeah you can create an all-rounder menu that you hope everyone will like – but then, particularly in this day & age, diets are so widespread that you could majorly miss the mark. And hell hath no embarrassment as embarrassingly embarrassing as mild social embarrassment, right?

Imagine the social ramifications – a collection of eyeballs bulging out as you dare to serve brie to a vegan! Or, on a somewhat darker note, the chance that the cake you prepared might trigger off a nut allergy – meaning a change of location from your living room to A & E.

And, believe me, the options in A & E vending machines aren’t gourmet. Even if you put a cocktail stick through them.

How would you resolve this predicament? It’s simple really. You’d investigate. You’d ask your friend and perhaps use social media to check their friends’ Instagrams – as, let’s face it, if a meal is munched without being uploaded to Instagram, was it even consumed at all?

But the point I’m driving at is that you’d research. You’d get an idea of who you were cooking for, and you’d make up your night accordingly. Creating a menu to accommodate everyone – a peppering of personal flair here and there.

My question is – why wouldn’t you do that for your writing?

Whether it be a blog post, a sales letter, social content, a novel, etc – you need to have an idea of who you’re writing for and what they’d like.

Next time you sit down to write something, take a little time to do some research about the kind of person you’ll be writing for.

Those reading a ‘young adult’ novel aren’t going to want to read a breakaway chapter about Thatcher’s Britain, while senior citizens aren’t going to respond very well to a meme about how annoying it is when your mum disturbs your FIFA game by calling you to dinner.

Personalisation is the key to connecting with your audience, and if you’re not interested in finding out about them you’ll struggle to engage them.

by whyididntwritetoday

Procrastination…the doom of a cyber generation.

When many bloggers or cyber writers tackle a theme they start off by pasting the dictionary definition of their topic…why!? Do they think their audience is too silly to know what the word means? Did they not know what it meant themselves? Or, are they just using it as a springboard to help their lazy ass get a creative flow going? My apologies, to quote many a millennial…’rant over’. Let’s get on with the blog post…

Procrastination
prə(ʊ)ˌkrastɪˈneɪʃ(ə)n/
noun

  1. the action of delaying or postponing something.
    “your first tip is to avoid procrastination”

In case you’ve not guessed this one is about procrastination, and for as long as I’ve tried to write creatively procrastination has been the main reason why I’ve not been writing. It’s such an easy thing to do, and an easy trap to fall into…I’ll sit there at my desk, ready to launch a full blown verbal assault on a blank word document, and then suddenly I’ll start to wonder what year Die Hard was released or what happened to an old footballer I used to like once he’d retired, or perhaps I’ll start to wonder how long it would take to fly to Mars in a rocket.

And thus that catalyst for procrastination ‘Google’ will open and away my hours will wile, access to information is great…but it sure as hell can shut the doorway of productivity at times.

Asides from maintaining focus, there’s not really a known cure for procrastination is there? Very few doctors seem to be trained in dealing with it, and listening to TED talks about it only further exacerbates the issue in the first place.

I guess it says a lot for how advanced the human mind is now that we have enough time for such a level of reflection that it can take us away from the present so easily. I mean back in the day, when cavemen and women danced across the far corners of the Earth, I’m pretty sure procrastination must have been nigh on impossible.

The fear of a T-Rex making me into a candlelit dinner for one would certainly keep my ass in check and stop me from googling the full cast and crew of an episode of ‘Friends’ to see if the bit part actor I thought I saw was actually in it!

But yet, as our lives and the worlds around us become more and more complicated, the more scope there is for delaying what you want to do.

So, today I didn’t write because I was procrastinating and, after thinking about cooking dinner for ages, decided to alert the nearest pizza merchant of my hunger and ask them to deliver their product forthwith.

I guess the secret to stop procrastination and maximise productivity would be to make sure I find the right project. One that I simply can’t put down, one that keeps me awake with flowing words until the wee hours. Mind abuzz with ideas.

But…finding that project…that’s the challenge.

by whyididntwritetoday

Sandwiched.

This sandwich sums up the reason why I didn’t write today.

It looks nice doesn’t it? There’s something just right about it, isn’t there?

If this sandwich was a sofa, you could bet your life that it’d be the kind of love-seat where you’d spend most of your leisure time. In fact, after a weekend, you’d probably be so glued to it that it’d take a spatula to jimmy you off.

There’s mozzarella, avocado, rocket and a bit of mayo. A lot of healthy, and just enough unhealthy to appeal to the devil on your shoulder.

But, let’s focus on what I said earlier – the ‘just right’. A lot of moments in life aren’t like this sandwich. Unfortunately.

I didn’t write today because I took too long trying to find that ‘just right’ moment and feeling. The chair was uncomfortable, there was too much glare on the screen, the TV distracted me, a friend messaged me…

So I moved seats, flicked off the telebox and muted my phone.

The sofa seemed like the perfect choice – light from the lamp glinted off the freshly polished leather as it whispered seductively to me.

Unfortunately, it turned out to have the sweet song of a siren and led me to ruin – it was way too comfortable! Soon I had my feet up, and as I sunk into the leathery folds of luxury my mind swam away from the realms of the written world and into the vast, encompassing land of procrastination.

And, thus, to further procrastinate I wrote about this – instead of writing the bestseller that’ll help make me my first million.

I guess the moral of this story is – not everything is going to be just right and not everything is going to seem as appealing as that sandwich – so maybe it’s best to ‘override’ our mind’s inner comfort fanatic and make the most out of the situation.

After all, the key ingredient for writing (when it comes to those of us who don’t do it professionally) is time…I had time to write…that was the golden thing. I had time! But, instead of using it productively I spent it all trying to find the perfect setting and the picture perfect moment.

Lesson learnt. Next time I have the time to write I’ll do so on top of an ant-hill if I have to, and every time I receive the stinging bite of a wrathful red ant on my buttocks I’ll see it as a cue to work a little harder.

Who knows, maybe if Orwell or Hemingway had had the same treatment they might have been even more productive…

In case anyone is more interested in the sandwich than my observations, you can find it at Buzz Kaffebar in the fair city of Copenhagen. Photo credits….to me.